Is that what you really want? To be a realisation? I’m no expert. And I don’t know you. Apart from your wonderful writing, which always leaves me feeling better after I’ve read it, chuckled at your throw away lines, and learned a smidgen about you.

And it feels wrong to give advice. But fuck it, I live for being wrong.

So I’ll ask:

What is it you want?

That’s all that matters. Go for that.